you are not the only person looking all the time, believe me. a young university man of my acquaintance described a woman classmate of his, as having "weapons of mass distraction". A female coworker, who many years later came out as a lesbian, when I first met her, admitted she looked at men's crotches and said, doesn't everybody? so maybe if you can stop worrying about it so much, and accept it as normal and natural? I am sorry you do not seem to have someone you can talk to in person about this, that might help you.