I think that a big part of me is angry.

Angry that I've never really gotten a sincere apology. Instead, "I'm sorry that you don't remember much of the happiness from your childhood and only remember the hard times." Or, "I'm sorry that you remember your childhood as being so painful."

Is it just me, or is that not acknowledging the pain that I've actually gone through?? Not a simple apology that they made mistakes. That's what I'd like to hear! Or, "sorry that your childhood felt so lonely and chaotic to you." That would acknowledge the pain that I have gone through & that they recognize it. That feels very important to me and my parents seem to be very against admitting their mistakes & the results. By not recognizing, it feels as though it's being denied.

I don't like it! And I just can't see accepting them until they actually can acknowledge my pain. Yes, it is my responsibility to let go of the pain and resentment. But, I need them to recognize that they played a large part in my pain. That's all ~ not kiss my heiny. I DON'T want that! I just want recognition.