Had a hard session with T today, reliving a traumatic event. He was very good, took all the steps to make me feel safe there and thena nd to check taht I was there and then at the end. I wasn't for a while - it was a really odd feeling. I was 18, not the 40 plus I am in reality. After I sort of came back he asked me how convinced I was that I was 40+ rather than 18. I wasn't very convinced to be often> Tonight I am jumping in and out. The visual memories but mostly the emotional ones are really confusing me. I keep trying to remind myself where and when I am and that I am safe, but I'm not doing a very good job of it. I didn't think this would happen. I thought I could deal with it. Over-confident me - I can handle what ever it throws at me, I am grounded. Well, I'm not grounded at all right now and I'm scared. I can't even find the ground, never mind connect with it.