i have weekly therepy, then see my pdoc every 3-5 weeks depending on how bad i am and when he can fit me in. they upper my med which made me reeeeally suicidal, so they'd gradually bin decreasing it but Im only on 10mg now! and it doesn't do a thing. i was on 20 before and still feel suicidal, so thy might put me on 15. i just can't see it working. I've not had my med for about 3 weeks now and am negative / anxious about starting back on them again because i know they made me really suicidal. i guess telling them i stopped taking them would be a good idea but id just feel like i was showing i don't care, which my mum constantly says its my own fault because i do nothing to help myself (which isn't true, i do loads, I've just reached a point where Im hopeless about anything actually working!) i guess i wish i knew what to do with myself. i wish my parents were more understanding (they are completely supportive!!) but there's no way i i can tell them without them biting my head off what would you do? do you think i should start my med again, or should i just tell them they aren't working and that they need to listen to me and try something new. we've been trying to get the dosage to work for like half a year now!! to me i just think its never going to work. it did at first though but just ... stopped working. ~ jess