I decided I had to be nice so I did not get fired from another job. I hit rock bottom. So I started with practicing nice and dependable even though I did not want to be nice. I made a mental behavior list of questions I made myself answer before I responded to anyone. One example I worked nights and the boss would call and wake me from a deep sleep wanting to know why I did something the night before. He said I was rude to him on the phone. I was. I was awakened from a deep sleep and on top of being rude I gave stupid answers like I put the keys in my laundry basket. So that is when I decided I would not answer the phone while I was sleeping and even turned it off during the times I was sleeping. I just listened to what other people said about my behavior and then took steps to correct whatever problem. I still only answer the phone on my terms some 20 years later to avoid the whole rude thing, just in case I backslide. Trial and error. A very painful learning process. I start my day with deep breathing and reminding myself to be kind and helpful. My work is very stressful and constantly reminds me I have to be on my best behavior. My new T helps me with grounding. And by going to T, I can give my best to my patients. 45 minutes of attention each week goes a long way in helping me with social stuff. T's even go to therapy so they can help clients by helping themselves. Hope this helps.