I can hear you pain in this note. I no you feel like you have no body to turn to and your scared to turn to the people you should beable to turn to. You feel like your being selfish but have you ever thought about what is triggering you to be depressed? Most people you age don't deal with knowing that someone they love have cancer. Its not being selfish and most parents don't understand it unless a professional can explain it to them. Have you ever thought it would be helpful to ask you T to explain it to them so they understand? You know your on your last strain but sucide is a BIG ISSUE so of course people may over reacted but your life is worth living for. Sometimes you need someone to help you realize why you should fight. I think you to tell your school counselor or your counselor but maybe you can ease into it. Maybe ask your counselor to not over react and to think clearly to stress your concerns about how you feel about feeling selfish and how your family doesn't need the extra stress. Maybe your parents aren't getting mad at the fact you have depression and not you. I stress to you to do something before you get to the point of not caring how you effect your family.