**************** TRIGGER for DEATH***************





I give up just cant keep fighting. Feel like I am teetering on the edge of a cliff one more thing, one wrong move and i will be consumed by depression. I should call T and Pdoc but Im resenting the hell out of needing them. Sometimes I wish depression would just physically kill me it has killed everything else. I hate that a few little things can throw me off soooooo much. Why anyone would love or care about me I have no idea. it is absurd that anyone would. Crap I cant even like/love me. Depression has destroyed EVERYTHING before it really had a chance to happen. Ok ok im done ranting and raving...dont feel any better. Maybe I shouldnt post but i need to.