The fact that your husband is being emotionally abusive to your daughter, who i take it is the six year old, because if its the two year old then ekk i like how alot of people focused on the ex, which if your still talking to him and want to be with him then your not being honestwith yourself or your husband, you guys are only talking as well which shows the strenght of your connection. if you had doubts about your current husband when you married him then that is to me a red flag, oh and never stay in a relationship if someone is being abused especially the child, or if the children have to witness him abusing you in any form. And of course you are going to love your husband, but there are many forms of love.
you said that you wished you did nto marry him, and that you are only staying for the kids, you know what you want to do, its the hurting someone that your scared about because someone is going to hurt and if you guys separate your going to be hurt to, but grieve and move on. it will take awhile but if its the right thing to do it will get better, and if you do decide that you want to stay with your husband then put your foot down that his behaviour towards your duaghter is not going to be tolerated as emotional abuse is at times worse then physical.