welcome to this forum, itsme.  do you know alcohol is a depressant? drinking caused my bipolar to play havoc.
i'm a recovering alcoholic. once i was told a very helpful idea-"if i drink to gain a feeling or drink to rid myself of a feeling i probably have a drinking problem".
in recovery i've found a peace, a serenity, a happiness i had never experienced before in my entire life. why not consider AA for a start? you may learn there are others with the same concerns there who have suggestions. there are other methods used to put down the drink but for me it was the one i chose. i'm thankful i did. i wish you well.
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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