A few weeks ago I found out that my wife recently ended an inappropriate online relationship with another guy. As far as I know, it never got past the X-Rated Facebook messaging stage, but it's possible she is not giving me the whole story so as not to hurt me any more than she already has.

We've only been married 8 for months. I love her very much, and I am completely devoted to her, but I am tormented by fears that this will happen again. I have nightmares, I am not sleeping or eating properly, and my mental health is deteriorating.

We have been working very hard on our relationship since I found out about the other guy. I believe that she does want to make things right, and she has been very open with me; she does not try and hide her Facebook, Hotmail, phone, etc.

The problem is, she expects a level of trust that I simply cannot give her yet. Trust, ironically, is what caused this in the first place. She started talking to this other guy because she felt that I did not trust her "enough".

The thing is, I always trusted her. Until this.

The few weeks of rebuilding have been amazing. We haven't been this close or tender with each other since we first met. But it doesn't take away the sting of finding out that you've been betrayed. It doesn't make the nightmares go away.

I want to trust her again. And I do, to an extent. But I don't know how to let my guard down. Or if I even should.