Gents, please permit me to obtrude into your discussion. On PC, we talk a lot about "transference" and what it is and whether or not things are happening in connection with it. And that's fine. Many true things and insights are stated here that benefit all PC people in therapy.

I'd like, however, to point out that all of us really do "transferences" in many of our interpersonal transactions from morning til night. Does anyone really think that transference doesn't affect your relationship with your spouse? With your children? With your friends and coworkers?

The difference between transference with T and with all the others are that transference with T is directly under T's eyes and therefor subject to T's direct observation and consideration. But that is by no means to degrade the value of transference with others. If you're working with T, I strongly believe that bringing insights to T based on, for example, relations with one's spouse, are highly valuable to T and to what you're doing with him/her.

Face it. Your own personal, early childhood adjustment to your parents is going to show up in ALL your future relations with people of all kinds. Your T knows this. You OUGHT to know this. When your transference with T isn't yielding particularly fruitful results, you can look to your transferences with other important people in your life. It's another important area to explore and to report on to T. Take care!