scorpiosis: I don't want to hijack Squiggle's thread--hope it's okay to comment on what you wrote. I wish my T could hold me too. Hugs aren't long enough. Holding her hand gives me almost the same feeling as holding me, though. Do you think that would work for you? The problem with a T holding us like we want is that it wouldn't be enough or we'd want it all the time, and we wouldn't want to leave therapy. I know if my T held me or cuddled with me I would want to continue seeing her forever just to keep getting it. Therapy isn't supposed to be a substitution for life. Yalom says that in A Gift of Therapy. It sounds like it would be the answer, but the goal is NOT for your T to satisfy those infantile needs. Seems cruel, though. We think our Ts can satisfy them, but that is a fantasy. At least I think it is.