This was a "core belief" of mine. I could (and did, in my mind, at least) make a list of all the times in my life something good was followed by something bad. Is that what you mean? Here is a short list that I discussed with T:
1. First Communion (2nd grade), my mother let me pick my dress, good (I chose one with an accordion pleated skirt, like a character in my favorite Betsy-Tacy and Tib books), followed by several bads: day of, mother AND father point out other girls' prettier chiffon dresses, saying I could have had one like that; a week later was the kitchen accident where I burned my arm with hot oil; Confirmation, 2 years later, my mother tells me since I "had my way" at the Communion, she would now have HER way, and made me wear nylons and she SPIT in my hair, it was so gross.
2. Just feeling confident about accomplishing something one day, I remember kind of laughing, next thing I know, she is slapping me upside the head, saying she "didn't want me to get a big head, then no one would like me."
3. Playing with other kids at a wedding one time, FINALLY feeling like part of the group, again she sWoops in on me and tells me I'm too big for that. Next thing I know I'm hanging out with girls 5+ years older than me, and dancing with creepy old men, and I remember one of my cousins' cousins asking me "if he had fiddled-faddled with me in any way" - not as a child abuse question, but as if we were peers. I had no idea what she meant, I would rather have been playing tag; I was ten years old but looked 16.

These are not "dangerous times" - having a baby in a covered wagon without airbags or hot running water, or catching pneumonia before penicillin was invented, that's dangerous times. You CAN break out of this loop, I did. You have to find the KEY, though. For me, it was realizing I was afraid of my mother. That it wasn't my best girlfriend's mother who was mean, as I had long believed; it was MY mother who was mean. I say these this without anger or malice, rainbow. I am just trying to find the truth about our r/s, and hope you can do the same. I don't have children, so the fear is less, but the regret is more.