Yes this does sound contradictory - but I assume your journal reflects the thoughts and feelings you had at that point in "now" - the time that you wrote them - maybe that makes them relevant in terms of the sort of language you use to communicate your thoughts and feelings, even if that is written to yourself.

I agree with sunrise though - these are your personal things and I would not feel obliged to show them if you felt too uncomfortable with that.

I stuggle in sessions and my T has suggested I bring my puppy with me to the next session - maybe he things she may help me stay in the now and be able to focus on my feelings more.