I'm just learning at 33 that my family was similar to this. When we were out in public it was like the two parents and four little angels. People would even say how good we all were. My parents would be so proud of it. In reality, we were to SCARED to do anything wrong. We had our butts beat regularly for every minute mishap. I was the youngest and I'm told the two oldest had it a lot worse than the two youngest. We were all good students in high school and all. On the inside we didnt have eachother to turn to at all. I don't know why but we all suffered in silence. I started breaking the silence at around 16. I pointed out how things just aren't right in the family and I hated my life. (I was always depressed and they knew it.) I was bad. I would sneak out, skip school, steal money, etc. So as my "punishment" I was taken to a psychiatrist. I went to that doc and and didnt say much at all to him. I was put on meds and rarely took them, when I did I never had a good reaction. Anyway, my family kinda stinks and I'm just finding this out. My husbands family is very different. They hug and kiss and say I love you to eachother. That is enough to throw me off right there. Since I have been in the hopsital and getting ECT and all that my mother in law has been more supportive than my own mother. I needed a ride to get ECT and my parents told me they cant they are going out of state to go GAMBLING! I didn't realize that that was ignorant until my husband pointed it out. They want to say in the "perfect" world where they have perfect little kids....