Just wanted to let you all know that... haha.
Well... it causes a lot of problems. My mind seems to work so different from those around me and my phobias make me a very skittish person... cover that up with a gregarious mask and you get a strange set of behaviors that end up in frustration for those around me.

I'm about to launch out into the big brave world again and try to join some sort of a support group. Last few things I've tried were disasters. I am even a misfit in CODA, ACOA, Abuse Survivors groups, AA and therapy groups. So... now I found a group for people with depression. I dunno... maybe this is all futile. I seem a bit autistic in my personality. My therapist says the abused people can kinda look like they are autistic because of the way the traumas twist their peronality. Sometimes I just curl up in a ball and wish there was a person to comfort me. That happened one time at my therapists office. It takes a really huge problem before a therapist will even touch a client and we had a situation that called for it. So... well... it was exactly what I always imagined it might feel like to have someone comfort me when I am in a ball.