This is bad.

I've been feeling panic attack-y all day, like I'm on the verge of one, but it's not going to come. I can't breathe, my chest is tight, my heart is racing, and I'm getting the tunnel vision. The worst part for me is I feel the urge to SI right now, but I just can't, but I want to, but I can't, etc... It's a cycle. I know the stuff that's stressing me out will pass, and I'm trying to console myself with that, but I don't want to console myself. I want to bite a huge chunk of flesh out of my leg. I want to so badly. Instead I've been scratching at my head all day long and making little cuts in my scalp (I know that's SI, but it's not as bad) and picking at my lips and gums and scratching my face to relieve that tension and desire. It's not working.

I'm going to try to call a friend and see how I feel after talking to him.