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Originally Posted by CantExplain
It is a paid relationship and it doesn't look real.
But therapy may change your views on what is and isn't real. In fact, I hope it does.
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I am still sceptical of this. Does *look* but real, but *is*? Not sure, I buy it (not pun intended).
So I am not sure I want this particular view of mine to be changed. Despite being awkward as hell when it comes to people, I have few people in my life, real relationships (that even look and feel real). It is emotional investment, but it is real.
For me the t-relationship is a training. You know, army training is not real war, eventhough it feels like that. Training for job is not real job, even if it include reality stimulations... I just fail to see how different therapeutic relationship is from other model situations. I don't mind, it is what it is and it has its merits, but real life it is not.
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The only thing that has ever kept me out of therapy was an unwillingness to deal with what I knew I needed to deal with-- in different ways at different times, issues from my past. I always knew that the right T would be able to help me with this and perhaps more importantly, I had *hope* that it would change my life in the way that I wanted it to change.
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shrugs, yeah... that is what I sorta need.
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I noticed in group therapy that the really desperate ones made rapid progress, while the rest grew more slowly. The ones who were only slightly dissatisfied didn't grow at all.
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Maybe because perfection is unattainable and the closer you get the slower the process approaching it is? It may not do anything with desperation and humility. After all as a political scientist I can say that the poor countries grow much faster when they manage to start their economy than the first world ones that maintain their standards...
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For me I find it unhelpful to trudge threw my past repeatedly or dissect every aspect of my being. They way I have found most useful is forgiveness, acceptance, changing things I can, never stop learning and growing, working on myself. I have been able to do it by myself by listening and paying attention to myself, trusting myself and just plain wanting it. I believe nobody knows me better than I know myself. I know what I need to challenge and work on.
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I see the point here. Yeah.... maybe past IS past and just moving on is the best thing? Why mess yourself up over and over about the same thing? Maybe some things cannot be resolved... and should be just left behind?
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These might not be the right therapies for you, but they don't sound wicked or incompetent.
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Dunno. We Czechs are cynical at whole... so hugging a teddybear won't cut it for most of us. And to be honest it *does* sound off and I simply don't see how can it help most people.
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you say that currently you are dealing with a lot of stress so that may be a place you want to start in therapy. and, the very things that are your objections to talking, feeling, making changes are what you typically want to talk about. i think if i'd known that my therapy would have been a lot more helpful. so, if you are worried a T might mess with your head then talk about that with the T and see how they respond and what you think of that. as for transference, chances are good you won't even experience it. a lot of people, my guess is most, don't. lastly, while i believe being intelligent is an advantage in life with therapy you are primarily dealing with the unconscious and it is more feeling-based, right-brain based than logical. while your IQ may be high you may find that your EQ may need a bit of help.
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oh, I am definitelly emotionally immature in some aspects, I admit that.
And yeah, I guess I could start where I am and not thrust myself into the deep **** straight on.... but it may feel a bit wasteful. *shrugs*
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I see people being too hard on Venus. Projecting their need or acceptance of therapy onto her. I think the state of therapy is not so certain at this stage of knowledge that one can be assured it will do no harm. Yes, going it alone is hard, but some feel they haven't a lot of choice. Finding a really outstanding T is not easy, either.
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It does feel like that at parts, it really does.
And I am think I stated my reasons why I am torn quite clearly. Poor Eastie in not best place in her life.
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