Heya guys am unsure of what i could be suffering from or have and need advice.

The symptoms i appear to have;

I speak to myself aloud when i am alone, its not a voice i hear in my head, its almost like an internal doubt but i often refer to it as "god". This voice does not tell me to do anything or even speak to me.

I believe i have slight paranoia. ie i quite often doubt some things that people tell me like as if they are lieing to me

I sometimes feel like im not real and question wether I am real or this world is real. I have looked this up and it seems to fall into "depersonalisation/derealisation" I dont feel any real emotion either

I really dont know what this is and i feel way too embarassed to go and see a doctor and would really appreciate if someone could help me with what this could be