Try to offer yourself some compassion. Much easier to say than do, I know. I'm also very hard on myself at times. Less so now than when I was younger. I used to think I had to be perfect all the time. Now I allow myself the occasional mistake.

About knowing what you want to do when you're 21: I didn't decide to become a librarian until I was 30 or so. I'll be 50 next week, and I've been bored with librarianship for some years now, so I'm trying to decided what to do next. It served me well for many years - paid the bills and made me feel like I was doing something useful. Now I'm ready for something new.

I hadn't a clue what I wanted when I was 21.