You are the one talking and determining what are "real" issues in your life. Stating you don't know what to talk about twenty minutes into the session doesn't strike me as knowing or wanting to talk about your issues.

You described the guy you were hanging with as "toxic"; I don't know what the issue is there? Why are you hanging with a toxic guy? You are in control of your life, not a T, they can't make you do anything, literally cannot do anything for you. If you make a statement like, "I was hanging out with this toxic guy I should not have been hanging out with" what do you want another person to say? The only response is, "then don't hang with that guy".

Why make it more complicated? I understand the thinking, "you don't understand, it's more complicated than that" but if that is so, talk about that? But look at the situation; you are not forced to hang out with anyone, it is easy and cheap to quit seeing your T at this time, but I would want to look at such a situation that is so open and shut. Either it is, or it isn't. If it isn't, what is the argument that it isn't, where are the "facts", not the feelings, the facts.

When you say, "I don't know what to talk about", your T takes you at your word! Were you lying? It's your therapy, you are the one coming to see him; if you do not have something you want to talk about, don't know yourself, what can he do about that?

You asked him to ask you questions and then criticized what he asked, implied he should have asked these other question over here. How is he supposed to know any of that? He asked what interested him, what he thought was important, what he wanted to know more about or thought would be a good direction for you to explore. You didn't like it. Okay. Where is he supposed to go with that? He's not interested in playing Twenty Questions with you and you do not seem to be helping him in any way help you; you merely stone-wall or don't like what he says or does, do not take responsibility for yourself and what you want in any way.

He does sound abrupt but that would make me curious; he's not in a vacuum so his abruptness is a response to me. What could I be saying or doing that would cause another to be abrupt? Exactly what is he being abrupt about?

Maybe he has a toxic brother or son or was himself once described as toxic by a girlfriend's friends or father. Maybe the girl dropped him as a result. Or maybe he hurt someone and wishes he'd been dropped. Or maybe a spade is just a spade and if you are complaining about toxic people, he can only say, "drop the toxic person"; were you hoping he would tell you how to "get along with" toxic guy? How to stay sane in a toxic environment? I suppose that is possible, for awhile, but it works much better if you stay away from the toxic environment.

I find it interesting he asked questions about your father and you were thinking your ex- was "deep"; all these men; hello, father was the first male we had a relationship with! If you had troubles with your ex- are courting trouble because you are hanging around toxic guy, maybe talking about your father in depth would help some? If not, why didn't you think a moment or two and decide to talk more about ex-? Your T thinks ex- is "deep", what do you think? It's your therapy!

I don't think another therapist, no matter how "nice" and less abrupt will be much "better"? More comfortable maybe, but that can be a double-edged sword; my couch is so comfortable I'm going over there now to become a couch potato. Perhaps if I'd bought an harder, itchy, more formal one I'd be forced to "do" something else that would be more healthy or satisfying in the end.