I'm a guy and I can honestly tell you that I would not make less than flattering remarks about my girlfriend to another guy friend unless I meant them. That's not guy talk, meaningless banter, or anything else that I know of. Unless I didn't get my most recent guy club newsletter and I'm behind on a few things...

To me, that's "guy code" for "I'm going to ride this thing out until something better comes along". I'm sorry if that sounds harsh, but there it is.

Do you really want to be with someone who treats you one way to your face, and talks about you another way to his friends? I would feel embarrased and humiliated if my wife or girlfriend did that to me with her sisters or girlfriends.

Personally, I think that an important part of divorce is that time you spend alone, being single and getting to know yourself again afterwards. Who are you? What do you really want in a partner? In a relationship? The worst thing you can do is jump into a new relationship out of fear of being alone.

Yeah it's scary. But that feeling of independence you gain from being alone and doing it all on your own is amazing, once you overcome the fear. And yeah, I've been divorced (twice actually, lol) so I'm not just blowing smoke up your rear. I've been there, and I've been scared to death to be by myself. But I got through it. You can too.

Please, just don't settle for less than you deserve.