Quote:
Originally Posted by rainbow8
Oh, zoo.  I'm sorry but I'm also breathing a sigh of relief, not because I want you to be in pain, but because I want you to feel better. 
Your T finally is acting like a responsible T and doing something that is FOR you, knowing that she can't be effective for you anymore. I wonder if that will be a little bit of consolation for you later on. She cares a lot about you, and that is why she made this decision.
I'm glad you are seeing the new T today. Is this is the one you posted about before, who you aren't sure if she's experienced enough to help you? If you don't think she's a good fit, then maybe she can give you a referral. Or, is this someone else? I am sure whoever it is can help you sort out your feelings for your T.
If you are thinking negative thoughts about you as a person, forget them!! It does not say anything bad about you as a person and as a client! You worked very hard, and so did your T. But something happened with HER, not YOU, and it affected your therapy. She had personal problems that interfered, for starters. She made mistakes, but that doesn't mean she wasn't effective all along. You posted that. You don't have to trash your whole therapy. Your T just stopped being effective for you, and it's no one's fault. You are a good person!!! I'm sure your T is too!!
There is no reason for self-hatred or feeling that your T rejected you. |
rainbow, thank you so much. You said exactly what I needed to hear, so thank you. I can tell myself these things, and I do, but it is easy to lose sight of what is real and what is just my brain going off. Anyway, thank you, and please feel free to repeat as needed, lol.
My new-T (this is confusing) but yes, she's the one I had before. She was my counselor/ case manager at the agency that then referred me to DBT. She had moved away, got some more DBT training, and then ended up coming back when the agency closed their DBT program.
So, she knows me and some of my history, so that's probably good. She is young, just 5 years out of school, and she doesn't have a lot of experience. She certainly doesn't specialize in trauma. But, I'm glad I have her for now, and I plan to talk to her about a possible referral to someone with more experience with complex trauma.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MELISSSAD81
Why wouldnt she give you a referral? That just seems wrong she knows you arent done with therapy and just because she feels she can no longer work with you doesnt mean she should leave out in space. Zoo I really truly hope you find a more mature and workable T and that you remember you have no reason to hate yourself for this...this is HER STUFF not yours.
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she just kept saying "I am giving you a referral. I'm referring you back to [community mental health agency."
I told her that I had hoped that, because she knows me, she might be able to think of someone I could work with, or that could work with me, but she finally said she could print out a list of names if I wanted her to. I asked her if the reason she didn't want to give me a referral is because she wants to maintain her relationship with her colleagues, and she doesn't want to inflict me on anyone she might have to interact with in the future.
Quote:
Originally Posted by just_some_girl
Sorry Zoo. At least she's made the decision for you, and now you won't have to keep agonising over it like you have for a while. I think it's a responsible thing for her to do, she must know what she's doing isn't effective for you now. Try not to take this badly or as a judgment on you as a person or client - as I see it, this was perhaps just as far as you were going to get with this T. I hope that starting with this new T will give you the opportunity to move on and grow. You'll get through this! |
there is some sense of relief, because deep down I know this is how it has to be. But that's deep down, way way under a whole lot of hurt and grief and anger and fear.
Quote:
Originally Posted by karebear1
(((((((((Zoo))))))))) I'm so sorry this happened, but you are strong enough to get through it. Just do like you said... one step at a time.
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people keep telling me I'm strong. I don't know if I am strong enough to do this, but I will try.
Quote:
Originally Posted by mixedup_emotions
((((( ZOO ))))))
I can only imagine how painful this feels, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I'm sorry you're going through this. Please post here as much as you want and as often as you want. Know that there are people here that care about you, me included, who want to support you through this very painful time. ((( HUGS )))
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thanks so much, MUE.
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She left pieces of her life behind her everywhere she went.
"It's easier to feel the sunlight without them," she said.
~Brian Andreas