Thanks, Sannah. It's still hard for me to find the middle ground with my T. She wants me to find peace and happiness in RL, so where does feeling good with her fit in? I feel like I can't enjoy the feelings with her because of my "pattern" of wanting too much from Ts.

skysblue: I have a couple of people in my life whose hugs feel good, but it's still not the same as a hug from my T. Or, it could be that after the hard EMDR session, I needed to connect with her and know that we still had a close connection. See, like you, I want to figure everything out instead of just feeling and accepting it.