I don't like being jealous of other people. I never use to be...but now if I hear one more person talk about how great their boyfriend is I just want to punch them in the face. I wouldn't really do that. I really am happy for them. I just cannot hear it right now.

What if everything turns out terrible? What if I am just being stupid? Is this even worth it? Am I just setting myself up for disaster? Will I be miserable for the rest of my life? Is there an emoticon for feeling defeated by life?