I've been SI-ing for nearly 11 years and I am 2 years free of SI-ing everyday and 4 months since my last slip up. But I think about it everyday and it is incredibly hard not to just say screw it and do it. But I know I shouldn't because whenever I've SI-ed I would binge for hours at a time and it ruined a lot of relationships with people I cared about. It came to a head my sophmore year in high school when my family staged an intervention: therapy and a SI support group or an inpatient facility for a year. The therapy was short lived and I wish I was able to continue it.

And here in the last month I was confronted by a coworker/friend about my scars. I had thought I'd been hiding them quite well when it turns out he'd known all along. Ever since finding out he knows the urges have increased tenfold.