Quote:
Originally Posted by Happy Chappy
I've been trawling through some of these posts recently and I've found that a common theme is the one concerning our relationships with our therapists. While I have only had some very limited experiences in this area, I have had enough to have felt these types of emotions towards both male and female Ts.
I can only imagine how magnified these feelings must be after seeing a therapist over a long period of time.
I would however like to point out that these therapists are being paid to be there, and if they were not being paid they would not be there. It really is that simple, cold but simple. The emotions are very real, but they are your emotions and not those of your therapist.
Good luck!
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Oh sure, if they were not being paid, they wouldn't be there. That is so true, but I'm not sure it changes anything, or minimizes what can occur when therapy is successful. It is what it is.
Also, in my experience, the feelings toward and about the therapist become much much less acute over a period of time, rather than the opposite.
At first, there is this "OH MY GOD" kind of feeling, it's really strange to pin down exactly what happens, but, for me, it was like a kind of panic. I transferred so much crap onto my therapist. My rational mind just couldn't figure out exactly who this person was (still can't). Things level out though. The waters settle.
Also, I notice you bolded somewhere in one of your posts that the "relationship is the problem". That is absolutely true I think, but the odd thing is, it's also a big part of the "solution" to what ails. Strange as that may seem, I think it is true. Working all the associated crap out that comes with this relationship is, for some, a huge part of healing. It's necessary, but not sufficient to be sure.
It's neither good nor bad, but there.
Also, I don't want to paint in broad strokes here, but I'm a chic. Always have been
. I've learned that for me, and a lot of other women, EVERYTHING is about a relationship of some kind. It seems to be what women do - form and fight to relationships. Why would my therapy be any different?