I don't necessarily think it's enjoying it, I think it's that it goes on for so long and effects you so deeply that you get used to it, so much so that the thought of not having depression anymore canbe a bit daunting because it seems like it would be someone I've lost touch with completely due to being so used to the depression. It's a horrible horrible thing to deal with, and I no I would do almost anything to get the old me back. I don't enjoy depression, it ruins so much and is so powerful, but then I may be afraid to let go of it because of what a massive part of my life it is. But no, not a single aspect of it do I enjoy.