I would probably have this fear too if I were in your shoes, but I hope I would try to refocus on the positive outcome not the fear that it might happen again and go horribly wrong next time.

I always think about the time when I was 11 and my dad decided it would be a cute idea to teach me to drive. He put me behind the wheel of our 1970 VW Squareback - red just like this one: http://www.volksworldusa.co.uk/wp-co...llpaper-02.jpg - and, with him in the passenger seat, had me driving around in circles in the field in front of our house. Then he decided I should drive on the gravel road next to our property.

So there I am, 11 years old, driving along a road for the first time ever, a little excited but a lot scared, when my dad (who was holding some kind of alcoholic drink in his hand, btw, what was the man thinking?!?) points out the window to the right and says, "Look at that quail!" So, I obediently look at the quail which is flying off away to the right and ... nearly drive off the right side of the road! Thank God my dad noticed and grabbed the wheel. (I also distinctly remember he took a huge gulp of that drink at that point.)

My dad apologized and explained that it was his fault because of course I was going to tend to steer in the direction that I was looking. Lesson learned. Unless you want to follow the quail into the ditch, keep your eyes pointed in the direction you want to go - down the road.

That was a valuable lesson, because I've found it applies to thoughts as well as eyeballs. You're going to get pulled in the direction of whatever you focus your attention on. So focus on the good outcome. Focus on your strength and wisdom in drawing on your resources - your husband, your medication - to help you make that good outcome. Focus on the fact that now you know what you'll do if faced with that situation again. Focus on the fact that that experience gave you a chance to exercise your will so now you're just a tiny teeny bit stronger.