I did a little work on eBay, otherwise I took a hot bath and listened to Grateful Dead bootlegs and now I'm painting a picture on a table top.

As I've been thinking, our whole relationship has been off. I don't really want to be her therapist, though she's encouraged me to get my masters and become a T. The only reason I do it is because I have no choice. I just want her to be whole, so she could really help me and everyone else. I see it as just stretching yourself too thin, kinda haveing it come falling down becasue of that. Then you go "Boy I suck. I really screwed up" , make amends and figure out how to not do it again. Also do a bunch of damage control. I dont see what's so hard about that? Why can't she just do that, even at this point.

I feel a little better as I am not waiting for her to respond to anything. I don't want to talk to her. I think I had better get a new T. just to get over this.

I agree, setting me up for this should be criminal. I didn't deserve this. A big part of me feels so embaressed to be reacting like this. I know she thinks I'm over reacting. Now that some else can relate my pain to her, maybe it'll get through her thick skull that this isn't about her.