Sorry to hear of your struggle. I would offer to try to understand. But, I am not sure that I can understand. So, I can only offer to read your responses and try to put myself in your shoes. I know I hate it when I try to explain my feelings/thinking to have it repeated back to me in an unrecognizable jumble. Hang in there and keep trying. I had to explain something to my sister three times before she finally got it.