I consider myself a warrior against my illness. I close my eyes and picture myself as like a Joan of Arch type character of a really mighty goddess with all of the power of the universe behind me.This can be very hard when things are bad, but I know very well the darkness that lives inside of my head. I know that it is there, waiting to grab me and tear me to shreds if I don't fight it.

I've never had much help in this. But my kids and husband play a huge role in keeping me going. I don't want to leave them here with trauma. I don't want to give up or lose this fight. I've learned that no no one can save me and no one will try. But I can save me. I can't just lay in bed. I can't just let the darkness take me away. I learned how to fight from my mom. She was much, much, much stronger than me. She fought off cancer for eleven years. She is my role model.