yep in the end every one of us has to take care of ourselves and our own happiness. it is nice to have help but we don't always get it and sometimes it is there but we just don't see it. i also have been very angry that no one is around to help me after all the years i spent where i was stable and devoted much of my time and energy into helping them. but my philosophy has always been "life is what you make of it" so while i am angry i still feel that i'm the only one who can get me out of here. even if my friends were still around, they might make it easier for me to get by but i would still be the only one who can get me out of here.

rapunzel has a good point about nurturing our inner chiild. that is something also that i think everyone needs, but i think we need it more than most because we are in so much emotional pain, and so fragile. that is the nice thing about a place like this. i did not mean to imply that we always need to be "adult" about things because i believe part of our recovery is recognizing when we need to be nurtured and seeking that out. it is still important to realize that we have options toward that goal, it may be very very difficult at times when it seems the rest of the world does not want to cooperate, but we have an added capability to nurture ourselves when we need it. part of what is so horrible about depression is that it cuts off our ability to recognize that need, or recognize that we deserve it, and/or unable to reach it on our own.

good luck audrey and hope things start improving for you.

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
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