The place was cluttered, not unsanitary. It's all clean now. There are no fire hazards. Rubber or latex gloves are not enough for me, and still mean washing my hands, because they make my hands sweat. They don't prevent dust from getting on me. I can't afford to buy a bunch of equipment, and my boyfriend both won't and can't get all the stuff I'd need.

You seem to suggest that because my OCD is not like your friends, that while I need to have things clean to touch them (and things have to be a certain way), but I can't touch things that touch the trash can from our previous apt. (if my bf had gotten a new one, this wouldn't be a problem), that my OCD is not real. Not every sufferer of OCD suffers in the same way.

We do not have cardboard boxes all over the place. There's a small area where my videotapes (and my bf's stuff) are, and there are a couple more with stuff of his in another area. I can't touch these boxes, and no matter what was done to them--contact paper or whatever--I cannot touch them without going through a huge washing ritual. And when I say I can't touch them, that also means with a dusting wand or anything. Most of them are my bf's, anyway.

He tells me he's going to try to keep up with his part, and I hope he does. But I can't control him. I can only do what I can do.

You act like I said we had food and garbage all over the place, and that wasn't the case. The blinds were dusty, and there was clutter. That's been handled.

You know, I've been in the bathroom much more often, had stomach aches and stomach nervousness, suffered headaches, bad nerves, and my OCD and anxiety have been worse through all this, plus I had to deal with other things in recent days, and I don't need this crap. I asked for advice on my rights. I already acknowledged the apt. people have rights.

Maybe I should just leave here, too. I had no one to talk to, because my bf doesn't want me talking to anyone, and I'm suffering and scared and alone, and I can't even get relief when I sleep because I have nightmares, and I'm doing the f***ing best I can. I'll go away and not be a burden to anyone. One day, I'll be somewhere by myself and I won't talk to anyone, so no one will have to worry about me or hear my sh**. The hell with me.