Hey Girl,

I am never one to judge anyone's relationship because I don't like people to judge mine. I also don't know the inner-workings of your relationship, just what you said, and yes, there are always ups and downs.

I don't know the situation with his ex and how he feels about her, but he's also not with her anymore, he's with you! There's obviously something about you that is important to him and that he loves or he wouldn't be with you. Saying "I love you" is really difficult for some people because they may not be ready to say it or don't want the commitment or feelings behind it. You yourself talked to him about not saying anything until you both were ready so maybe he's concerned you wouldn't say it back?

In my personal situation, I was with my boyfriend for a year before he finally said "I love you" and I questioned why myself. As our relationship progressed I asked him why it took so long before he told me he loved me even though I knew he did. He said that he knew he loved me, but he didn't want to be in love because 1. He's never been in love before and was scared of getting hurt, 2. It changes the dynamic of the relationship and 3. Because of where he was in life (he'd just become a pilot and the first year is hard; he figured no one would stick through it).

I'm sure you know deep down how he feels about you so the words shouldn't be as important to you as how he treats you. Maybe try to take it one day at a time. Oh, and don't cheat just because you're having problems in the relationship, that's messed up and just break up next time! Anyway, best of luck, I hope you get your questions answered.