Quote:
Originally Posted by kaliope
What you describe sounds very confusing and must be very hard for you to deal with. It does not make sense that he would change so drastically under the circumstances you describe. Like your post alludes to, you are searching for a triggering event to make sense of it. A full medical workup would rule out anything physiological causing the change and barring that therapy to look for psychological triggers that would explain the change. Him being unwilling to seach for a cause leaves you powerless to do anything.
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TY Kaliope. Yes, we are all trying to understand what "triggered" this change.
He has been through extensive health check ups - he is in a cardiac program since his episode 3 years ago. He has several doctors he visits every six weeks to 3 months (depending on each doctor's specialty). They tell us there is no indication he had a stroke or previous cardiac arrest.
This has left me, indeed, thinking that it is a psychological issue . . . but no getting him to a psychiatrist or psychologist.
I feel very defeated by all this - beaten down emotionally. His health is precarious and I keep telling myself that I came so close to losing him - I should be patient and realize how frightening it has been for him to face his mortality and to have been forced into so many changes in his life. His heart is damaged and he has little stamina . . . and can't do the things he used to love doing (outdoors activities). So I know this frustrates him. I can see how that could make a person feel bitter about life. But the changes are so much more than just a bad attitude or snarling temperament. He just comes across as an entirely "different" person - mean, spiteful, angry. It is the obfuscation that gets to me the most - well, that and the bickering and need to create drama.
I just wondered if a dramatic personality change is even possible at his age. Was he "hiding" who he really is all these years? Can a person even do that????