I wasn't really looking for answers, just venting. Thanks for the replies though. Yes, my depression is chronic, mixed with major depressive episodes (possibly bipolar 2). I have tried so many drugs and combos, and so much therapy. I just am getting through day to day right now. And, no, thanks to all this, I am not working at all. It's usually so much just to get out of bed each day.
HUGS to all of you, and thanks for the understanding!