Sorry you feel limited by your age. Actually, 40 is a good year. You have maturity, and hopefully ability to make good decisions vs the decisions we make when younger.

I understand about the piloting and all. I used to fly, though not a private pilot, I took plenty of different craft up to learn how to fly it and land it... just in case the pilot couldn't ;}

Some of what you are experiencing we all experience as we get older: feeling like we didn't make the right decisions, feeling like we don't have time to make another big mistake... etc etc. But the world today says that ppl in their 70s are still providing needed work force.

Please give yourself more tries... it might take visits to a few different psychologists to find one you feel you can trust. (And revisit the need for medicine, too, okay?)

<font color=green>...I can misspeak like the best of us</font color=green>