"It was a very ODD feeling - like being there but not being in any control and not being really aware"
That also describes my experience in therapy at times (and elsewhere)
Mr Bear is starting work full time soon so there is a good chance I will actually be able to see a T soon (if I can find one) instead of talking about it

and doing self help (or trying to )
Fuzzy
PS your T sounds good and helpful (my T said that working on my past pain was "overwhelming" for me but I do not think he was much help in helping me aquire more "coping skills")