I think that what your dealing with is that in a hospital enviornment you felt safe, had the attention you needed and there was a structure to it. I think that is why you feel like you want to go back to that environment and have a desire to replicate it in other ways.

You were very young in the hospital and it brought care and comfort, was clean, structured, that is what all children love. All children try to produce whatever they learn as a safe environment. And all humans do that we are designed to do that for survival.

The tears are most likely a little bit stress, a little bit thinking your going to find what you feel is a comforting safe lifestyle existance.

Open Eyes