I started taking medication again...I was off it and doing good for a long time. Whatever it is that makes me feel down has been triggered. (cloudy weather perhaps? There's probably more to it than that, but I'm sure it contributes) In any case the medication is helping a lot. I'm still working on the underlying 'disconnecting' issues. There seems to be more to that than just the depression. Learned behaviors from family life growing up, I'm thinking. But even there I think I'm making progress. My parents were pretty disconnected and not affectionate growing up, but when I see them I've started hugging them and they seem okay with that. Whether they like it or not is unclear--I think they like it on some level but altogether are uncomfortable with physical affection (it's amazing they had so many kids)--but I'm glad they seem to realize that it's important for me.

I guess the bottom line amidst all this rambling is that I'm having better days thanks to getting back on medication. I even got on the floor and played with my kids today! *Patting self on the back*

Thanks for the feedback...it's nice to know there are others who experience the same thing.