I'm sorry your family is being terrible and not supporting you. But I also understand completely.

Growing up I had something wrong with me and everyone just kind of ignored it. I think if my mom had lived she would have figured it out. She was really smart. The support from my dad was always "Depressed? So what? Everyone is depressed! No one wants to hear it." (I'm sure he at least has depression.) Even my hallucinations and delusions were just totally ignored. Well, I was finally diagnosed at 30 years old! Yay! I felt so much better just knowing that something really was going on and I was not just a freak.

But, as for support... I don't really have any. I didn't bother telling my dad. He has a lot of health issues and a bad heart. And he's already so pessimistic. I just, didn't tell him. Or my other family. I told my husband, who grew up with a bipolar mother. I think he resents that I have bipolar, too. He doesn't talk to me about it, except occasionally when I let it slip I'm not doing so well and if we have a big fight he'll use it against me. "Time to take you to the hospital!" I seriously thinks I'm faking it... So I figure just best to keep it to myself.

But his mom, my mother-in-law. She has bipolar 1. She knows. We listen to each other. I'm fortunate to have her as my mother-in-law. But, you know, I don't run to her with my issues because she isn't well either, and she lives in another state.

Having never received the care I wish I could get, I just don't expect it any more. I have to support myself. This is my battle. For years I expected someone to care. I mean really, really care and say "Everything will be okay." Well, I am learning that I'm that person.

And you know, everything will be okay.