The way I see it is that your feelings for your T are real and genuine. To be ashamed of and to deny these feelings of love would be detrimental to you. The feelings are real and honest. To deny them would be like lying to yourself and to your T. T's need us to attach to them so we can heal. I loved my first T and still do love her. I think of it as therapy love. There are many types of love like husband/wife love or parent/child love. There is agape love which is love for God, I believe. So in my mind I believe in therapy love and therapy mommy. I spent a lot of years being ashamed of my feelings towards my first T and it was wasted emotion. I told my new T this and she validated my feelings and I also told her I was starting to feel the same way for her and I am not going to waste one minute being ashamed of my feelings towards new T. They are my feelings and the feelings are real and honest. Old T expressed her love for me years later when she sent me a sympathy card when my dad died. I spent all those years being ashamed of my relationship with old T because other people told me it was wrong. No what is wrong is to deny your feelings if other people including your T do not see your relationship with T as loving and safe and warm and healing and helpful. Love is good.