Hi, I can see you're in a hard place. I can see by your writing that you're going through a moment, here. That's okay. I have lots of moments myself.

Hey, I'm an artist too! Well, I'm a writer mostly. I am trying to write a novel. I've been trying since I was 12 to be a published author. At 13 my goal was to be "the youngest epic fantasy novelist in history!" That didn't turn out so well. Now I think it would be great if anyone would even read what I write. I'm 32. So, 20 years ago I had this huge dream that never took off. So, I hear what you're saying about feeling like you're not getting anywhere.

It really makes me mad, too. >.< I know I have the talent. I know I have the story. I just can't get it out! And what I do get out, no one reads. >.< So, yes, life is very annoying. On top of that, I fear my bipolar is eating my brain. I'm slipping away slowly but surely. It scares me to death.

So I totally relate to your frustration. But, that doesn't mean you have to be mean. Sounds like you have depression if you're on prozac? Depression is one of those illnesses that throws off your ability to take care of things. Steals your motivation. It isn't your fault, and it is good you're mad, really. Because being mad means you do still care. You don't want to give up and give in to this. You want to fight. You can turn that anger into fire in your belly. I know you can.

Depression is part of bipolar, so I know it can be so hard. Irritation, no focus, brain fog, exhaustion, insomnia. But, it is worth the fight. Even if it doesn't seem like that right now. It really is worth it.

Hang in there.