Hi Kacey. I don't post here much but I had to jump on to just tell you that you remind me so much of myself, particularly in my earlier years of therapy. I so totally get acting out in the heat of the moment. The truth is that I am a highly functional adult who keeps it relatively together in real life. In therapy, however, A TOTALLY different story!! My needy, feral, angry, possessive child self comes out, and the person in there is often not who I am in my adult life at all. So, it makes so much sense to me that you behaved in the way you did. Does it mean that it was appropriate and acceptable and ok? Well, no, of course not, but different people go to therapy for different reasons and issues, and those issues will come out when specific buttons are pressed.

I will share that I have done crazy things in T. I have actually refused to leave my T's office when my session ended because time was up and I thought he had treated me unfairly. It was time to go and I refused, like a child. He had to leave and take the next client to a different office. Was it ok? no. In retrospect did I wish I had been able to keep better composure? Absolutely. But, it happened, and I was being very honest and real in the moment, and these are my issues.....that's why I am IN therapy, and have been for a friggin gazillion years!!!!!!!

Anyway, just wanted to tell you that I get it. I think that understanding and condoning are two entirely different things. My T told me that I am the highest maintenance patient he has ever had because of my attachment stuff, so I feel you there as well. I am sure that your T wasn't surpised by your behavior and it is just reflective of the reasons you are there to begin with.

Therapy is hard. It brings out the ugly. Attachment issues are beyond painful and I wouldn't wish them on anyone. I have no idea how I would have reacted had I been in your shoes, but I truly think that I would have been worse.....and I think I am a lot older than you too!!.