The pony is somewhat stable but still struggling. I am very afraid, she has not made any manure, will only nibble grass and I don't know if she is obstucted and cant process. I wish I could take her to the hospital but I just don't have the means. I don't like this at all and I am flashbacking to memories of one I lost and tried so hard to help recover. I feel like I am failing and she depends on me so much, this is so hard. And it is just a reminder that she got so sick when chased by my neighbors dog, it just created digestive issues for her that I have been addressing ever since. I am so tired of being trapped with all this aftermath, it just never ends.

Thank you for your prayers, I am trying not to let this aggrivate my PTSD and that is so hard too. I shake alot from nerves, I hate how I can't seem to control it. I just keep trying to be in the moment and when I cant do that I run to PC and just try to post and think about something other than this. This is truely hard. My brain doesnt know what to do, I am trying to diassociate in a healthy way? If there is one?

I am in the dark here, I don't know the pathology I cant get that so I am at the mercy of hope. And I don't like not knowing what is going on inside her.

Open Eyes