Hey. Ditto. Same here. I've put my "plan" on hold while I make one last ditch effort at some state of recovery, or feeling better. In the past I've been inconsistent with my treatment. This time I'm being diligent with meds, appointments, and I've even been going to various mental health centres & participating in activities. The first few weeks of my new meds, I thought I was noticing improvement, but it was just my anti-depressant triggering a manic episode. Now I've developed tolerance, I'm way down again. I only hold out from what I really want because I have pets who I love & care for. I worry about what would happen to them if I went. I think it is nearly possible to die from loneliness, feels that way anyway. Feel free to contact me for a chat. We could both probably do with the company. Keep me posted.