It seems that men do not always want the benefits we provide as often as we think. Working three jobs may have a lot to do with it. I find that when my husband isn't in the mood and I am, I become the aggressor and seduce him. He may think it is weird at first but then he can't help himself and I get the sex I want. Massages and light touches in sensitive spots without him making any initiative at all work wonders. I obviously don't know the details or your situation, but if it is not your role to take the lead, you might try it. My husband loves it when I take the lead, even if he is tired or being a crabby, picky jerk at the time