I'm totally out at work, and my appearance is a dead giveaway(i wear eye makeup sometimes). He does seem like just a really friendly person, but moreso towards me. He's usually nice to people at his register but i haven't seen him ever approach just a random person in the store. I've kinda forced myself to let the idea go, if he's interested hopefully he'll come to me, but the vivid dreams i have don't help. Its moreso the situation itself that i want to avoid, those ideas getting in my head and me becoming completely enthralled by, essentially, a stranger. I have been diagnosed with bipolar 1, borderline personality disorder, anxiety disorder, and various delusions. The erotomanic delusions have been the one thing i can't seem to keep under control, and it seems to be the most self-destructive. I'm obsessed with the idea of being in love, and once i find it i do anything and everything in my power to make sure that person never wants to leave me, which in itself pushes most away. I sit and watch all my friends in their perfect relationships and long to have that bond with someone, but it always proves so elusive.