#possible violence trigger#
when i was little (before the age of 12) i'm told i used to get rage 'fits' and attack the child who harmed me or 1 of my siblings. But i have zero memory of this, i remember feeling angry and hurt and then hiding in my room. When i was 14, I chased my 8y.o brother down the street with a butcher knife, (in hindsight, i'm SO glad he's faster) also this particular memory is VERY vague,doesn't even feel like it was me. A few yrs ago, again,my memory's a bit vague, but it was definitly less than 6yrs. This 'neighbour' grabs my ponytail and slams my face into a car bonnet. We fight,the fight gets broken up, i go home to ice my face, next thing i know i'm confronting her, and she spews ***** bout how i think i'm better than everybody else. Please keep in mind that she is a big girl, and i'm like 1.53m. I don't remember being scared tho... Next thing i know i stabbed her #ashamed face# and ran away to my then bf's place. If thats not bad enough, i threaten her friends. Told them if they wanna come after me,they're welcome,but they must walk in groups at night. WTF! Anyway,turns out the girl who started the whole thing was high on meth and somewhat drunk too. We're on speaking terms now,and she hasn't touched drugs or alcohol since... By the grace of God (and the help of my dad) no charges were filed against me. I also stabbed my then bf in the leg after he choked me unconcious. Another memory that seems surreal. PC peeps... Please don't think of me any differently. I don't know that person i just told you about. Also, when i was medicated, rage didn't come so naturally anymore... Just thinking now, was i a bp kid? Man, hope i didn't scare anybody off,just thought i'd share... I know i sound like a psycho *****amajigger, but i'm not, atleast not without being provoked.